Mother of the Groom

• By: MountainFarmgirl
• On: 07/03/2011 19:15:59
• In: Mountain Bounty, Mountain Blessings
• Comments: 20

The Mountain Farmgirl recently got all gussied up in her Farmgirl Finest  for a red-letter milestone day in her life! The reason? Her oldest son’s wedding! You are invited to join her as she shares this very special event and all its exciting details, in “Mother of the Groom” …

See that picture of the woman holding the baby?  That’s me … about 10 minutes ago (or so it seems). That ‘blink of an eye’  between ‘then’ and ‘now’ was actually almost 25 years in real time; but honestly, where DID the time go? Farmgirls, if you have grown children of your own, you know exactly what I’m talking about. If yours are still young, however, let me warn you that you that one morning soon you’ll be waking up to discover – as I did -- that they are suddenly  grown up, getting married and leaving the nest.  Believe me, it feels like it all happens THAT quickly! (Not to worry, though  …  fortunately, even grown up  little chicks have a way of coming home to roost once in awhile!)

Our son Christopher (now almost 25) was born almost exactly 10 years after we lost our first child, a baby named  Andrew.  Needless to say, I savored every moment with Chris from the first time I laid eyes on his perfect little form.  Like most mothers, I prayed for him over the years, for his future, and for the woman he would someday fall in love with and marry.  I devoted all those mothering years to him and his siblings, giving about  1000% -- and loving every minute of it -- because that’s what mother hens do! Of course I made some mistakes along the way – everyone does – but my husband and I must have done a whole lot right as well, because when I looked at him on June 18th – his wedding day – I was button-poppin’ proud of the man he has become, and of Elizabeth, the woman he has chosen to be his life partner.

This young couple has an interesting story, which I won’t go into here, but if anyone is interested, our son Noah made them a wedding website that has lots of photos and personal stories on it at

 http://oneloveonelifetime.com/  

One of the unusual  things that you WON’T find on their website, (at least it’s kind of unusual for this day and age) -- is the fact that each of them had asked their parents for  Purity Rings when they were much younger, pledging themselves to stay pure for their future spouses.  They were both virgins when they married, and they never slept together until their wedding night. In fact, all four of our children have personally made this choice on their own, a decision that makes me very happy and proud of each of them.
So my Farmgirl Friends, allow me introduce you to my oldest son Chris. He’s had an interesting childhood! He was homeschooled all his life, and lived with us in a tipi for 9 months when he was 3 (until we finished building our temporary lodging). Chris later helped us build our permanent post and beam house; ‘helped’ birth 2 of his siblings at home, and played competitive chess that took him around the country and to many international championships in Europe and South America. In high school he was an officer in the Civil Air Patrol, was awarded Cadet of the Year, and also named  Young American Ambassador to China, where he spent the summer of 2007 in Taiwan and on the mainland. At the end of his senior year he was the recipient of the Congressional Gold Medal, awarded to him by our Congressman in Washington, DC  … (a great program, by the way,  for kids up to 21 years of age, homeschooled or otherwise. Check it out!).  Chris was a good student, but had an entrepreneurial spirit from a very young age, that turned his sights to interesting enterprises and projects rather than to college. Starting with raising mice for pet stores when he was about 7; helping to run the family Farm Stand for more than a decade during his middle years, and to being our assistant Manager here at The Lodge until about a year ago, Chris does everything he does with gusto … and this includes his amazing engagement to Elizabeth, which I should probably start with, as it sets the scene for the beautiful wedding from which I just returned.

Chris  doesn’t do anything by halves; never has and I’m sure he never will! That’s just his nature. When he decided to ask Elizabeth to be his wife, he planned everything down to the minutest detail.  He and his sister picked out the beautiful engagement  ring which he presented to Elizabeth one unforgettable evening at Glen Ellis Falls, about 10 minutes from where we live in the White Mountains of New Hampshire.  Glen Ellis is a 65’ waterfall that you get to by walking down a series of stone steps that wind through  fern-gladed woods, ending at the bottom where the waterfall empties into a large pool of pristine water. Chris had fresh flowers placed strategically along the steps, in addition to about 100 candles. He had also music playing as a backdrop to the splashing water and whispering trees. About half way down this idyllic path, he had a table set up with hors d’ouevres, the stopping point where he finally popped the question. Fortunately, Elizabeth said YES, or she would have missed the beautiful candlelit table set up at the bottom, on which was a dinner for two, specially prepared by our daughter and youngest son.  Yes, Chris is a romantic as you can see … and Elizabeth is everything we ever prayed for in a wife for him. She grew up in a wonderful family from Buffalo, New York, the only girl in a family of 3 brothers.  At the end of May this year she graduated summa cum laude from the University of Pittsburgh, where she was on the Deans List each semester on  a full pre-med scholarship. She received many awards and honors for her research in her major field of study,  Neurology. She is pretty as a picture, smart as a whip, funny, happy, thoughtful, kind  … and …. Well, I guess I’d better stop because I could think of about 100 other descriptions and I want to invite you now  to the wedding! Anyway,  you get the idea …  I am in love with her as much as Christopher is, and with very good reason. We had the pleasure of meeting Elizabeth’s family when they came to meet us last summer, and we loved them instantly.  They stayed with us the better part of a week at our cabin in the woods, and we got to know one another and plan for the Big Event!

My husband and I are innkeepers in one of the most beautiful spots on earth … a place that has become known for its Destination Weddings, among other things, and we have been involved in putting on more than a few weddings for our guests. Although we had fantasized that Chris and Elizabeth would get married right here,  the deciding factor against it was Elizabeth’s very large family, all of whom lived in Buffalo … and our very small one (for whom travelling the 11 hours was not so difficult for the 25 of us as it would have been for the 125 of them).  The drive wasn’t as daunting for me  as the months and months  of planning the responsibilities that would take place at such a distance, and in a location to which I had never been. As “Parents of the Groom”,  we were responsible for putting on the Rehearsal dinner, which the kids wanted to have at a beautiful park. As a former restaurant owner and caterer, planning the menu and making the food was the easy part; but getting it there, heating it up and successfully carrying off a party for 65 kept me up  nights in the beginning. Good planning and organization are always key elements to success, however, and as in most things, most of what we worry about never comes to pass. As I wrote the addresses of the guests on the Save-the-Date cards and on the  wedding invitation envelopes in calligraphy, and also again while I lettered the framed Marriage Certificate that I gave them as a wedding gift, I had lots of time to plan in my head the details of  the rehearsal dinner party for family and friends.  I ended up shipping about 15 large boxes of party supplies and decorations  on ahead to Buffalo, and brought the food and the frozen cake layers (yes, I was also making the wedding cake!) with us in the car.

On the Wednesday before the wedding, our daughter, youngest son, my husband and I ‘shuffled off to Buffalo’ as they say, in our little Prius --- packed to the gills for the 11 hour drive.  We arrived safely, though twisted like pretzels from the cramped quarters and the lengthy trip, but happy to be there, and SO excited! After what had seemed like months on end of rainy weather here in the northeast, both the Rehearsal and Wedding days dawned picture perfect in every respect ... a clear, sunny 80 degrees.  The young people in our families – siblings, cousins and their friends – about 15 teenagers and twenty-somethings in all, were a blessing to me on the day of the Rehearsal dinner. They were the most lovely group of young people you could imagine… and they helped decorate the gazebo-style pavilion where we would hold the dinner and festivities that evening.  The entire day was taken up with preparations and it was one of the most fun and precious times that family and friends have ever had!  The food turned out great if I do say so myself, but truly, the food was unimportant … it was all about the coming together of two special young people who were very much in love. And it was about their respective families and friends sharing in that joy, and forming a larger family that will always be there to offer our love and support over the years. What a blessing it was! Our college friends – three couples in all --- had made the long trip and were there, which touched us deeply. It was a lovely event. That evening after the  rehearsal dinner, I took a big sigh of relief --- well, almost! Although that weighty responsibility was now lifted from my shoulders, I still had to decorate my wedding cake layers and get them to the Reception the next morning before  I could truly relax!  I used to make wedding cakes professionally, and my sister currently does, so between the two of us, we had the cake thing  covered!  However, if you’ve ever watched the cooking channel and seen the cake competitions, you know that the job isn’t done until the cake has been successfully delivered and set up in its final location ... sometimes easier said than done! 

I made the layers back home and froze them for the long trip.  The bottom tier was a ginger-apricot pound cake, the next was an awesome carrot cake recipe, then a German chocolate cake, and the top tier was Chris’ and Elizabeth’s favorite, a tiny carrot cake to be saved for their first anniversary.  My sister Sue put each double layered tier together with filling and frosting, while I set to work doing the decorations on the outside of each layer.  On the wedding morning, after we had our hair done along with the other girls in the wedding party, my sister and I drove the layers and set up the cake at Shea’s Performing Arts Center, a restored and very ornate opera house-style building in downtown Buffalo. At this point, the reality was setting in that MY SON WAS GETTING MARRIED!! This was made doubly -- and visibly -- clear when I saw the marquis on the front of the theater all lit up with their name in lights: “One Love, One Lifetime” starring Christopher Belcher and Elizabeth Anger”. 

With the cake successfully delivered, all that remained was to go back to our hotel, get changed and get to the church on time!  While I’m most likely to be seen in farmgirl overalls and work boots this time of year as I get our gardens planted and our inn all landscaped for the season, I can tell you that this Cinderella farmgirl  was transformed into a fairy princess once I donned the ‘fluff and feathers’ of my Mother of the Groom attire! My dress was of  plum colored satin, adorned with a hand beaded shawl. It was accented by a purple feathered Fascinator in my hair. Wow, ladies, I felt like a Queen!  Once we got to the church I was overcome with emotion, as I knew I would be.  (Good thing I switched to waterproof mascara!). I was proud as a peacock as our sons Noah and Joshua greeted us as Best Man and Groomsman, and our daughter Zia Alida was a beautiful bridesmaid.   The chapel was an architectural gem, the effect of which was made even more beautiful by the musicians who were playing the cello and violin. But truly nothing was more radiant than my beautiful soon-to-be daughter-in-law as she walked up the aisle to join our son, who was beaming from ear to ear! It was a very proud moment in our lives, I can tell you. Pastor Brown, with whom they have counseled for the past year with other soon-to-be-married couples, flew from his native Pittsburgh to marry them. Making it even more special, Chris and Elizabeth’s wedding was his last, as he is now officially retired. It was a beautiful ceremony.
The reception was so gorgeous! The venue was out of this world … truly a glimpse into a past world that no longer exists. The food was delicious, and there was lots of dancing, good times and memories made. And then, in the blink of an eye, Chris and Elizabeth were off to Savannah on their honeymoon, and we were headed back to New Hampshire! Our hearts were full, our first born was officially a married man.  As I write this, Chris and Elizabeth have just returned from two glorious weeks in sunny Savannah, Georgia, and are busily setting up housekeeping in their new apartment in Pittsburgh, PA where Chris is the Assistant Manager of the historic George Washington Hotel. Built in 1923, it has 30 hotel rooms, 60 Assisted Living units and 40 apartments.  Elizabeth will be continuing her research before starting grad school next year. Through the coming years, the  good times and not so good, may they always see the world through eyes filled with the love they  share today.

Here’s the latest video clip of their special day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=US_f5Qf2r5I

Thanks, gals for being part of this very special event in my life and for letting me share it with you.  Remember, love makes the world go ‘round!  Please sign my wedding friends  “Guest Book” in the comments section below!

Until next time,
Mountain Bounty, Mountain Blessings,
The Mountain Farmgirl